Uccello Journal

What I thought I knew

2010-10-20T11:06:00.003-04:00

Just a quick post...

I have always thought that I was the type of person who just doesn't get lonely. I can go to movies or dinner all by myself, and it doesn't feel strange to me. Even after having the kids, a couple of days with no one in the house but me used to be just fine. Going a whole week alone I would start to miss them, but that's not really the same thing as feeling lonely, you know?

The realization hit me the other day, though: I didn't feel lonely because I felt that I would always have my wife there if I needed her. Ironically, I know she will still be there for me if I need something, within reason, but the fact that we are really under no obligation to support each other drove home the fact that I can, in fact, get lonely, and will likely be feeling that way for the rest of my life.

I know engaging in games of "what if" are rarely, if ever, productive, but I can't help but think that maybe if I had known this ages ago, I would have shown Allison more appreciation for her, what she meant, or means, to me. I have to consider that we both could have been much, much happier, and all of this pain could have been avoided.

All I know right now is that I can't let myself get hurt like this again. I would rather be lonely than get into a relationship that I would mess up. Constant chronic pain can be ignored with enough time and toughness - but these spikes of agony just drive home how much everything hurts, and I don't want to do it anymore.

Depression

2010-08-03T12:14:00.002-04:00

It is really hard to describe to people what this feels like. I have heard such ignorant comments as "You laugh all the time, you can't be depressed", or "Ha! I made you smile, you're not depressed".

Probably the easiest description is to picture waking up just before sunrise on a really cloudy and overcast day. There is light in the sky, enough that you can walk around without a need for a light, but everything is darker than it should be. You can't wake all the way up, even if you aren't tired. If you are having a really good day, the sun comes over the horizon, but never clears the thick clouds, and you can't shake that sleepiness. On the bad days, you hope that the rain comes, and takes you away from everything, but it never does. The world has no joy, not for you. Colors are duller, the things you love are boring, food all tastes bland, you want to do nothing but sleep, you aren't tired, and nothing will ever get better.

Before I got really bad in 2009, Allison pointed out to me that I was acting like I was depressed, so I got some Celexa from my Primary Care Physician. It was enough of a dose to clear the clouds, I could function as a human being. I didn't notice until far too late that I was still suffering from symptoms: mostly attention span. This let my work suffer, which I have summarized elsewhere. When everything finally hit me at once, I started being more proactive about what I need to do to take care of myself: get to a psychiatrist and a therapist. In the first week of my LOA, I got into see both of these professionals, the Psychiatrist upping my mediation by 50%, and the therapist giving me a good outside perspective on myself, one that I really needed.

I don't have too much more to say on this, but if you ever find yourself feeling like you can't go on, please get help. I know it is hard, but you need to take care of yourself, and you can't always do it alone. Trust me.

Realization that a 13 year relationship was ending

2010-08-01T01:50:00.005-04:00

This coming Friday we meet with a divorce mediator. I am really happy to finally be moving on with this next phase of my life, but I am still really saddened that it came to this.

We have had our share of troubles, we have both brought up divorce more than once in all these years. I honestly wish I knew why we never went through with it before, and I honestly wish I knew why this time it is real.

I know people want to blame Allison, and that is unbelievably unfair to her and to me. The truth is, both of us have been unhappy, both of us have been putting up with a situation that we didn't want to be part of. This time it was her who decided to end it, and I thank her for having the courage to make that choice that I was too afraid to make, so many times.

Early 2010, Allison decided to go see a therapist. She had been noticeably unhappy for a while, and found a "life coach" kind of therapist. It seems to me that he helped her realize that she did not want to be married to me anymore. Like so many things here, all I can say is what it appeared to me, I am not saying that this is the factual account of things, just my perception of the situation.

It was around the time of the census starting that Allison told me that she wanted a divorce. Unlike the last time one of us brought it up, I told her that I agree. She seemed surprised that I would not argue, but I knew that she wasn't happy, and neither was I, so why fight it? She told me that she didn't have a timeline planned yet, but her hope was that once she started working for the Census, she could put aside some money, and she would move out, letting me keep the kids and house. She knows that I like my life: working, spending time with the kids, basic boring American dream, and I think she wanted some excitement. She felt really fulfilled when she went to Houston to help after the hurricane tore the town down, and while she was a full-time mom, that kind of adventure was too hard to justify. So we agreed to continue on the path we had long been on, living as roommates.

When she started real census work, she made fast friends with a bunch of co-workers, and seemed really alive for the first time in a while. I had a dash of a concern that one of her co-workers and her were getting very close, but between our discussion of divorce, and her happiness, I didn't fixate on it much. It turns out that they are very close, but still only friends. Being friends with him makes her happier than I have, maybe ever. Sadly, the perception a lot of people have is that he is the cause of all of this, but it isn't the truth.

That isn't to say that it didn't hurt. Really badly. Her wanting to leave in the unspecified future was very different from her being so much closer to someone else right now. It was a personal hell for me, and on top of my work situation, it was so damn hard to deal with. The worst part was that I was trying to be supportive of her, but kept messing up, getting her outright angry at me. All of this made me realize that as unhappy as we both were, for so long, I still love her, and will miss her dearly.

The hardest part of all was putting on a good front for people who didn't know anything was going on. I had told some of my family, but the kids and her whole side of the family was in the dark. When we told them all (after the kid's last day of school) I felt so much better. It was such a relief to be able to talk about everything without worrying about rumors getting to people before they could be told. The timing wasn't great for Allison, because of the perception of the "other man", I have been trying to dispel that as the cause ever since.

Now I have a couple of women's phone numbers, nothing is actually going on yet, but I feel ready to date. Allison is much happier, and might even have a place to live (that isn't with her soon-to-be ex-husband), so we, including the kids, can adjust to this new life before school starts up in the fall.

Work Troubles

2010-08-01T00:28:00.003-04:00

This is all being written with the benefit of hindsight. I don't know how much differently everything would have gone with forewarning, but I suspect quite a bit better for me.

Everything started in late 2008, but I was really oblivious to it then. I was lucky enough to work on an IRAD (Internal Research and Development) project, which was really interesting, and a lot of fun. There were some challenges, but I thought they were understandable, and resolved pretty well. It turns out that it really took too long, and was the first mark against me; but no one bothered to tell me. 2009 rolled around, and I was working on a different IRAD. This time I was aware of the troubles I was running into, but had been discussing them with the project leader, not that it made any difference. I was having a hard time remembering little details, and I was having a hard time keeping my mind on a given task. It was around this time that Allison pointed out to me that my mood had been really dark, so I spoke with my PCP about getting medication. It helped my mood, but the quality of my work was still behind where it should have been, and I still hadn't realized to what extent.

After that IRAD, I was back to the main project I was on before I got to go to the cool ones, and the middle of the year was upon us. This meant that we were supposed to get mid-year reviews, the first time it was mandated at Raytheon. I met with my boss, and his mid-year assessment was that I took longer than expected on a few tasks, and should work on getting things done faster in the next half of the year. All in all, a constructive criticism, but given what was coming, it left a lot of crucial information out.

I was allowed to work on the newly added software build for the project I had been on. It was a broad-reaching update to code that had been stable for a very long time, so I wanted to be sure I got it right without too much trouble. However, I didn't get all of the details of what the system architect wanted, and had to start over on the task. He later changed his mind, making me start over again. I was optimistic about getting things done, but I kept uncovering new problems. I thought the build leader understood the problems, but I was wrong.

After three times that I had to adjust the end date for my part of the project, I was informed that I was to be removed from that build. At this point, I finally saw that I needed help. My attention span problems which led to missed details needed to be addressed; my job had suffered from my inattention to what was going on in my head, and I contacted HR for help with work, in light of suffering from depression.

Late March or Early April I had my 2009 performance review, which was terrible. I was placed on a Performance Improvement Plan, which could result in my separation from the company if it was not completed to management's satisfaction. The idea of these PIPs is that I was given three tasks, which need to be completed in six weeks. The first two tasks were estimated (by whom, I don't know) to take 1 week each. The last one should have taken around 1 month. I got the first task done in 8 days. Not as quickly as I wanted, but not too bad. The second task was a trainwreck. My proposed solution was rejected, and I had to go with a solution that I didn't like, and it didn't actually solve the problem. Worse, it took a lot longer to work out. After three weeks, I was allowed to go with my solution, and finished in less than a week. However, this left the final task (the one that needed 4 weeks) with one week before it was due. In the middle of May, I was told that I had failed my PIP, and would be let go from the company.

Given the state of my marriage, this was more than I could deal with. I seriously considered ending my life. My Life Insurance would provide for the kids better than I could without a job. I saw that I was truly useless to everyone, and my death would benefit more people than my living would. I decided to go home, say good bye to the kids, and take my own life. Obviously, I changed my mind before I even got home; the kids would be devastated, even if they would have financial security.

I went back to work the next day, and started asking my former boss and people I had worked with what I could do. Gayle, who was my favorite section manager ever, suggested I take a medical leave of absence, and she spoke to my department manager on my behalf. I took her advice, and filed for Short Term Disability, taking off all of June and part of July so that I could get help with how I was feeling.

The insurance company forced me back to work in the second week of July, too soon in my mind, and too soon in my psychiatrists mind, but I need to keep money coming in, so I went back. Since returning, I have had my immediate boss making unreasonable demands, belittling me and telling me that what happens next is unknown. For all I know, I will be fired any day now, or the company could be too afraid to fire someone sick, and they are just trying to make me so miserable I quit.

How much things can change in 2 months

2010-07-21T10:43:00.003-04:00

So, thanks to the wonders of Facebook, I suspect this blog post will not contain any shocking new revelations, but it might be useful to gain some insight to my last few months.

Some time around my last blog post, Allison informed me that she wanted a divorce. This is not the first time she has started this conversation, and it is one I had initiated more than once in the last 13 years. I had been feeling very much like we were not "married" for a while, so I agreed with her, without batting an eyelash.

more to come later...

Depression
Work troubles
Realization that a 13 year relationship was ending
Leave of Absence
The Future

Maybe I'm back.... but I doubt it.

2010-05-10T09:17:00.004-04:00

Apparently someone out there still checks this long-abandoned blog of mine, at least some of the time. I'm still a terminally quiet person, and not likely to actually keep this up, but it can't hurt to try.

It's been over a year, so where to start?
April - Allison and I went to Georgia to attend "Jordancon", a fan-created convention centered around Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series. We had a chance to speak with the author who is taking over the series, and meet the original author's wife, cousin, publisher and loads of fans.
May - McGuire had a piece of art in an art show. There are pictures in the gallery.
September - Archer started Kindergarten, and McGuire started 6th grade.
January - I took a trip out to Indiana to play D&D for three days. It was a lot of fun, and I got to hang out with my friend Steve.
February - We got a trip to Florida, thanks to Allison's sister. We did some volunteer work to get a day pass to Disney World, and had a good time.
April - Allison ran for a position on the Millbury School Board, but did not win a seat. It turns out OK, since she was getting very busy with her new job working on the Census.
May - McGuire finally took the plunge into the spotlight in his Spring concert - playing a trio of the Harry Potter theme in front of a high school auditorium.

I had a request for my Xbox Live gamertag - and who am I to deny an honest query from my nephew. I cleared off a friend I haven't played with in ages, so I should be able to accept his friend request.

How about pictures? Loads of them?

Uccello Journal

I'm really bad at this

2009-03-30T18:57:00.003-04:00

I'm having a bit of a shock at seeing that it has been six months since I put anything up here. I guess my "quick post when Allison and the kids are at church" idea isn't quite panning out. Thankfully there is "bored at work, and not really willing to grab another task before I go home" time.

In what might be a record, there is a chance I'll see Kurt briefly tonight, that would make three times in four days - possibly the most I've seen him since leaving for the Air Force! I'm just glad that I was able to help him out in his move, even if just by storing his stuff for a few days. He's so nice, he gave me an old guitar of his, so I can hopefully take my Mad Rock Band Skillz(tm) to the real thing. So far that is panning out to be a bit more difficult than the fake plastic guitar, but I'm not going to call it hopeless just yet.

I made an account on Facebook, so far I have found loads of people from high school that I had totally lost contact with (some of whom I actually regret losing touch with). Still have found no one from Nellis AFB, which is a bummer - I'd love to drop Vito, Seth or Brett a quick line, so I'll just have to keep trying to locate them. I keep checking friends of friends to see if I can find any unrelated loops in friends, sort of a 3 degrees of separation kind of thing. No luck on that either, but I have an idea - my friend Matt from work moved out to Colorado Springs, so I think that is my best bet, see if any of his friends connect to my sister's.

Allison Update

2008-09-17T13:55:00.003-04:00

Just spoke to Allison on the phone, she is helping out in the Houston Convention Center. She actually seems to be having a satisfying trip, helping people... some people are strange like that, I guess.

I found some pictures of the damage on-line... wow, she is going to be busy.
http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2008/09/the_short_but_eventful_life_of.html

Allison in TX

2008-09-13T22:10:00.001-04:00

Since I can't remember who I told what and when, here is a quick update on what's going on in my life. Allison volunteered to go down South to help with Hurricane relief. We thought it might be right around Labor Day in Florida, but that wound up being no big deal. Instead she finds out on Friday September 12th that they need her on Sunday. We had a nice time at the annual Raytheon trip to Canobie Lake Park on Saturday, then Sunday I brought her to the airport to head down to Texas. Here is the email she sent out from there:

Hi Everyone,
I made it fine to TX though my luggage, with all my clothes, didn't. Delta took off my luggage in NY when they shouldn't and it got left in JFK. Good news is that it came in today. I haven't done much yet. I've been assigned a team of 5 others and we're waiting for assignment. I did go on an errand to Marshall, tx - 2 hrs away, to deliver some supplies for a shelter. So that was nice that a few of us were able to do something besides sit around.

Hopefully tomorrow will bring something. They plan on opening shelters in the disaster area and we'll have sporadic everything so I may not be able to keep you posted besides this. I'm staying in a staff shelter in Dallas today and it's not bad - group sleep area,etc. The most exciting thing is that they have phones we can use for calls and there are red "Incredibles" phones! :) Anyway I hope you are all doing well.
email me at allisonuccello (at) gmail.com
Stay well!
-Allison

McGuire Uccello and the Chipped Toilet

2008-08-19T17:57:00.002-04:00

The timing really is quite perfect: he's going to be 11 this year, the same year as Harry Potter when he started at Hogwarts, and now he has his very own forehead scar in time for school! Luckily for me, the scar had nothing to do with evil wizards, a dying parents protection or flying motorcycles, but it is a good one.

The version of the story I heard was that McGuire was getting ready to go see an animal display at the library while visiting his grandparents in Maine, and before they left, he needed to brush his teeth. Being 10, and stubborn, he was watching a TV show while brushing. So when his grandfather turned off the TV and made him go into the bathroom, he didn't like that. Solution: sneak back to the TV as soon as Grandpa's back is turned. Of course, he knows he'll get yelled at when the volume notifies the adults of his addiction, so he runs into the bathroom to hide. The tile-floored bathroom. The slippery tiled bathroom. Can you guess what happened?

Note the chip on the tank. That was not there before the tooth-brushing.

McGuire is fine, despite a trip to the ER and a CT scan. He got 6 stitches and might wind up with a thin scar down the road. For now, it is just a red line on his forehead, healing nicely.

Kids....

August Birthday Parties

2008-08-13T14:43:00.002-04:00

So, better late than never?
It was a weekend of birthday parties, both of which went quite well. Carrie was first, hosting us on Mom's birthday at her house. Us, in this case, was my family, Kurt, Carrie's family, Dad and Joanne, Mom and Don, John and Laura (it was also John's birthday)

Pictures...
My boys with both paternal grandparents at the same time!

World War 2 Memorial

2008-08-12T18:31:00.002-04:00

Just wow.

Such a beautiful monument, and a great time to appreciate how intelligent McGuire is. We spent a long time talking about the Second World War, things like Isolationism and making hard decisions like dropping nukes. Pictures are found in my picasa Web Album.

WW2 Memorial

August Wedding in DC

2008-08-12T18:29:00.003-04:00

8/8/08 marks the wedding of Allison's second oldest sister.

Boys in Tuxes

At the Church

On the bus from Chapel to Reception

Ring bearers and Flower Girls

McGuire Dancing

Archer Sleeping

Taking Care of Business

2008-07-28T20:47:00.002-04:00

All quiet on the home front, for me anyway. It's been a crazy mix of crunch time and vacation time at work, so for the last three weeks I have been doing the work of anywhere between two and four people, obviously none of it as well as two people would do it, so I've been working my butt off, putting in all kinds of overtime, and not spending more than the occasional weekend day with my family. I have been able to swing the extra time such that I still have two day weekends, which is great, it just isn't quite as nice as the two/three day weekend cycle I'm used to.

The next few weekends should be crazy, birthday party at Carrie's for her little ones, then one at my place the next day for Archer. I can't believe he's four already! He certainly makes the most of his inherited stubbornness, I think he just might be the most stubborn person on the planet, and he is willing to argue with you that he isn't until you both pass out from hunger.

I tried to get Dad to come to John and Jane's house this past Saturday for a party, I didn't know it was to celebrate Jaime's college graduation and landing a job with "The Magic Treehouse: The Musical"! Major congratulations for that one, she is on a first-name basis with the author of the Magic Tree House books, so I thought that was pretty cool. Dad decided that he didn't want me driving all over CT just to let him socialize, which is silly, I never would have offered if I wasn't willing to do it. Jim was making fun of him, but most people were just bummed that he didn't come up.
It was a really fun time, Archer and McGuire were busy playing with Tucker, John and Jane's half-lab dog, and Keira, Josh's lab/beagle mix. I got to spend some time with James, who is a gamer like me and Josh (complete with the M-rated violent games!) and talk to Jaime for a bit too. It was a really nice time, me and the boys stayed until like 9:30, so Archer was a total mess when we left - just a bit overtired. I also got to show off my Rock Band skillz, which was awesome. I've turned some kind of a corner on the drums, and now I can play most of the songs on Medium without too much trouble, just the occasional shin cramp.

One tough old guy

2008-06-26T16:58:00.002-04:00

As requested, an update on my Dad.

I saw him the day of the accident, and the Wednesday he got home from the hospital (6 days later), then I saw him again the following Sunday. Quite the difference between the visits. When he got home, he could walk, if barely. His feet were really swollen, and his knee was very inflated as well. His hands were casted up pretty well by that point, the right hand already in a cast that should last a while, the left hand in a more temporary one, to facilitate removal of stitches when the time comes. He again winds up being fairly lucky, in that he has some mobility in his fingers, even though the breaks are limiting his strength with them for now. For example, he can cradle a cup of coffee, and manipulate the straw into his mouth, but he can't pick up the cup on his own. I felt bad when we saw him on Wednesday: Archer carelessly crashed into his leg; the look of pain on his face injured me. I stayed for a few hours, enough to make sure he was doing alright, and see that he could make it up the stairs, which was hard, but he managed it.

Sunday I brought the whole family down to see him. McGuire had been worried about his grandpa, and I think he was a bit jealous that Archer got to go down there with me and he didn't. Allison got her weekend plans ruined due to my recent inability to schedule anything, but she was a good sport and a good daughter-in-law and came down too. We visited for a pretty short time, mostly just to take my Dad off Joanne's hands for a while and have lunch with him. His mobility was dramatically improved in just a few days. He could walk a lot easier, and it seemed like he had a much better feel for how to deal with having a few weakened fingers instead of two hands. We took him out to the 99, and he was able to feed himself really well. He needed his food cut for him, but I had to have that done for me with only one broken arm. To me, as nice as it was to have a really nice visit, the actual best part was that after Archer had one minor freakout over the seating situation, his behavior was as good as possible, for days! He had been a huge pain all day Friday, Saturday and Sunday morning, but after getting calmed down, he was a little angel until Tuesday night. It was pretty nice while it lasted.

One thing that has always impressed me about my father is that he is so into toys. His motorcycles, his police scanners, his PDAs, his laptops, his satellite radio; he just really likes the new, shiny technology. While so many people from his generation seemed wholly terrified of the battery-operated devils, he is always picking them up, learning how to use them and seeing if they "stick". With his hands so beat up, using the computer will be really hard for him, as would reading or most things needing manual dexterity. So what does he do to combat the boredom? Picks up the new DS package that comes with Guitar Hero On Tour bundled! While he was at the store, he got Mario Kart DS and Brain Age, too. I recommended a few turn-based games that might work better with the casts, but I think Guitar Hero might be the perfect thing for his situation: it has a strap to connect the DS to your hand, and the frets will be great exercise for his fingers, keeping them strong while he heals. I have no idea if he can play Mario Kart with the casts, the game is pretty thumb-intensive on both hands. Either way, I just think it is the coolest thing to have a 60 year old Dad who buys himself a DS! I can't wait to exchange Friend Codes with him and kick his butt at a Mario Kart race.

Near death

2008-06-17T09:21:00.004-04:00

What an interesting weekend this Father's Day was... I refer mainly to the Thursday, June 12th when my Dad got into what should have been a fatal motorcycle accident; but there was also the visit to the East Coast by my sister and her family from Colorado. To think that I went into June thinking that seeing my nephews and nieces would be the big excitement...

I guess I should start with Thursday's fun, while it is still mostly fresh in my mind. I was sitting at my desk at work, around 4pm, when I got a double ring on my phone. This indicates an external call, usually Allison; but on this day, it was Joanne. When the first thing someone says is "He's alright, but," you usually know that something bad is coming. She goes on to tell me that my Dad has been in a motorcycle accident, and broken both of his arms. I think I got a few details then, enough to convince me that I didn't need to leave work early, but also enough to convince me that I needed to get to the hospital to see him that night. I think I have a habit of expecting the worst, and it has served me well, once you get past the extra stress I put on myself until I get the truth. This was really no different, I stopped at home after work to get some food and see my kids, who I knew were worried about their Grandpa Bob. They took a lot longer than I wanted to wait, but they really wanted to make cards for my Dad, so I had to wait. Eventually, I headed down the to hospital, roughly an hour away in New London.

I get to the hospital (after driving past the exit, no kidding, 3 times) around 9pm, I think. I get a good spot, and see Joanne walking outside. She takes me to his room, and I'm wholly relieved to see that my Dad only looks tired and in pain, not destroyed. He told me that he broke one of his right hand bones, and his left forearm. They had also done X-Rays on his neck and a CAT scan on his chest. When I got there, he was just about to have his right hand splinted up, which caused him a fairly high amount of pain, and he went into some shock, sweating and getting close to passing out. Joanne and Anita were freaked out, but I think I was able to keep them calm while getting a cool washcloth for my Dad's forehead. The ER doc suggested that my Dad try to walk around a bit, so the nurse came in to help him get ready to try. Keep in mind, his left arm (the worse break) was neither splinted nor in a sling. I tried to tell him that he should just tell them he couldn't do it, but he felt like he had to try, probably because the nurse was pretty cute. Thankfully, he realized that he would not be able to stand up before he tried to support his weight. The imbicile ER doc came back to say that the neck X-ray looked good, so my Dad could go home that night. Riiiight, he can't stand, has two broken arms, and is doped up on morphine, but he can go home tonight. I had made my mind up to stop that from happening, but the orthopedic specialist determined that his left arm would need surgery.

We tried to keep Dad fed and watered before midnight, since it sounded like he would be going into the OR in the morning, and he needed to fast after midnight. I left around 12:30am, since he was supposed to get a room on the surgical floor shortly, but I guess that didn't work either. His morning surgery wound up happening at 8:30pm, and the 1-1.5 hour operation lasted until 2:30am. I felt awful about the whole surgical angle, since I had forgotten to metion to Carrie that Dad was having a metal plate put into his left arm, and when she found out in the morning, there was nothing for me to tell her, since I was waiting for information, too; information that was not there.

My Dad told me about the accident: he was driving down 184, when a woman in the other direction decided to make a left turn across his lane, not giving him enough time to stop. He hit the brakes, and the bike began to skid; he knew that he was not going to stop in time. He had the smarts to recognize his predicament and just before impact he stood up on the bike to get the height needed to clear the car. The bike hit the passenger side of the car with enough force to bend the frame of a 900 lb Harley and total both the car and the bike, throwing my Dad over the roof of the car. He had the sense to be wearing his helmet, so landing on his head didn't kill him. He had the instincts to stand up, letting him slow down more gradually in the air and on the road instead of against the side of the car. He had the reflexes to get his hand in front of his face, which broke his hand, but kept his face intact. He had the luck to not detach his retina, going blind; he had the luck to fall in such a way that his neck wasn't broken.

I think I have only been this scared for a loved one twice before, since Archer is such a fearless kid, but even with the potential head trauma in my little boy proving harmless, I don't think I've been this relieved over a terrible situation before. I'm not ready to lose my parents. Thanks for not dying Dad. I love you.

April in Washington

2008-05-26T23:28:00.004-04:00

I have created a flickr account to store photos, I'll attempt to link them here to get a more solid "blog" thing going on.

We were a little worried about the trip down to DC, since I finally got the orthopedic surgeon to take a look at my knee. I didn't know how bad it would be, but I figured my knee was bothering me anyway, and the operation should be pretty trivial, able to walk out of there. It did wind up OK, but man was my knee tired at the end of every day! I got the pictures of the inside of my knee, in case anyone is interested.

We took a train ride out from Boston, got a neighbor to drive us into the city bright and early. We got a brief surprise visit by Allison's sister Michelle in Boston, one of the resaurants she manages is just a block away from the train station, so she saw us onto the train... and didn't get off in time! She wound up riding with us towards Providence, where she was able to get a ride back into Boston. It was pretty funny. The train ride went well, took longer than flying, but so much easier, and less stressful than driving. Archer got a nice long nap in on the way down, fell asleep watching McGuire play on the DS.

We were met in DC by Mary Ellen, Allison's long-time DC resident sister. She had just announced to us that she was engaged, everyone else had met him, except for me. We went to his place for a picnic later on. First thing we needed to do was meet up with Carrie and her family, who were vacationing in DC for Sean's birthday. It was raining, and they were not having the best vacation time, but it was nice to see them anyway, they are such a photogenic family.

It's getting late, so for now I'm just dumping a bunch of pictures and I'll maybe toss in a bit here or there to describe them.

I can't get enough of Abraham Lincoln's writing. There is something so simple and so eloquent about it. McGuire probably thought I was weird because I felt like I just had to read the Gettysburg Address and this out loud when we were at the Lincoln Memorial.

This statue is in the Capitol building, I can just imagine Senator Clinton pausing in front of it for inspiration when times get rough. The uncarved block in the back is saved for the first woman President. I hope it is not still uncarved when I die.

McGuire and his aunt and soon-to-be uncle at his house in DC. He's a software guy, with a big strong dog and both of them like my kids. Three good marks for him in my book.

Catching up

2008-05-09T20:27:00.005-04:00

It's been since March that I put anything of value on the blog, so I really want to try to fill in the gaps.

In late March, we went to Mom's for Easter. We were 4 of the maybe 60 people there, but it went well. The kid situation at these gatherings is crazy! There were so many little boys and girls running around, it was really great to see McGuire be able to play with kids. Fortunately he is much more adept at socialization than I ever was.

We went to Washington DC April 18th! It was a long, but nice, train ride. More details and pictures will follow here.

McGuire's Karate school closed with only one class after we got back from vacation. To say that he is devastated would be a huge understatement. For now we are looking at the same franchise in a different town, but it is a half hour away, when the old school was 5 minutes. We are also looking at a different place, another one in town. That is still all up in the air.

Also on the McGuire front, he had his Spring Concert. Dad came up to see it, and McGuire had a solo that turned into a duet. He had been practicing "Aura Lee" ("Love Me Tender") but one other kid was also doing it, so they got their two solos turned into a duet. I have uploaded the video to YouTube.

Look at me, less than 2 months apart!

2008-05-09T20:21:00.003-04:00

So much for the idea that I would actually post frequently, or even regularly. I had this grand scheme, on Sundays, when Allison is at church, Archer and I could think of things to post for family to read. That plan almost made it one time. I'm so pathetic. Basically, Allison got paranoid about the amount of information some people put on the web. Beyond just the provocative MySpace pictures of teenage (and preteen!) girls, things like where people live and their routine could make it easy for a sick (evil) person to track a person down from their web profile and hurt them. With respect to her, especially given her good intentions, I had refrained from putting anything up. I have come to the point, now, where I feel like having this token communication with people I care about is well worth the risk of the Internet Sickos, who I am not sure actually exist (at least not trolling blogger.com).

Image dump

2008-03-18T21:06:00.008-04:00

Here goes, my first attempt at getting some pictures on the blog.

This picutre is from Christmas Eve, if the date on the bottom left didn't give it away. Pretty much our annual "Family on the couch" picture. This is at Carrie's house.

Here's a bunch of good "guess which kid it is" pictures

No fair using the different resolution to guess the age of the photos, either. I can tell who is who, but some of these you could just swap one kid for the other. Almost seven years apart and they look practically like twins, they even act like polar opposites of each other a huge percent of the time.

My Mom made me do it.

2008-03-18T16:12:00.000-04:00

Seriously. After seeing how nice it is to have Kim updating a web page with all sorts of info on her family, and Carrie following suit, my Mom said I should do one, too. Considering I'm the most 'techy' person I know, and most of my time is spent interfacing, in one way or another, with computers, it really does make good sense. I started a blog about my gaming habits around the beginning of the year, but I'm just not that good at keeping that up to date. I'm going to try to be better about this one, since the purpose is to let my family (extended) know what is going on in the lives of myself, Allison and my boys. I will try to get pictures up at least once a week, and hopefully some kind of "what's going on" at least weekly, too. We'll have to see how it goes I guess.